Divorce Rich with Jacki Roessler, CDFA

The Money Moves That Can Make or Break You — Jacki on Journey Beyond Divorce

• Jacqueline Roessler, CDFA • Season 1 • Episode 42

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Taking control of your financial future after divorce isn't just important—it's urgent. When that settlement ink dries, most people want to close the book and move on, but that's exactly when crucial financial decisions need attention. What happens in those first weeks and months can dramatically impact your long-term security.

In my conversation with Karen McMahon on her Journey Beyond Divorce podcast, we dive deep into the post-divorce money moves that absolutely cannot wait. From creating a strategic calendar of settlement-related dates to making immediate decisions about retirement accounts, we break down what needs your attention in the first three months, six months, and within a year of your divorce finalization.

Visit us at https://www.roesslerdivorce.com/ to learn more about Jacki's practice and to find valuable resources for your case.

The Divorce Rich podcast is proudly sponsored by Center for Financial Planning: Striving to Improve Lives through Financial Planning Done Right! https://www.centerfinplan.com/

Speaker 2:

Welcome to the Divorce Rich Podcast. I'm your host, jackie Ressler. I've been a certified divorce financial analyst for 28 years, helping clients and their attorneys navigate the often complex and confusing financial issues in divorce. If you're in the process of, or considering, divorce, now is the time for you to take a deep breath and give yourself permission to find clarity on the financial issues you're facing. Rich means many things to many people. I believe the best definition of being rich is someone who has access to many resources. Along with my guests on this podcast, I will be bringing you a wide variety of information so that you can make sound and informed financial decisions for your financial future. Hey, if you're recently divorced or still in the middle of it, you already know that life can feel like it's been turned upside down and, let's be honest, the financial part it's overwhelming, confusing and often the last thing you want to deal with. That's why I want to tell you about the Independent Wealth Management Team at Center for Financial Planning. Their team of certified you want to deal with. That's why I want to tell you about the independent wealth management team at Center for Financial Planning. Their team of certified financial planners specializes in helping people just like you navigate life changes with confidence. Whether it's assessing your new financial circumstances, creating or updating your retirement plan or helping you adjust to the new normal, they'll work with you to get a clear, customized plan to feel in control and move forward with confidence. So if you're interested in working with a financial planner who you can trust to have your best interests in mind and you're ready to take the next step, visit centerfinplancom that's centerfinplancom and schedule a conversation. Center for Financial Planning Live your plan. Securities offered through Raymond James Financial Services Inc. Member FINRA, sipc. Investment advisory services offered through Center for Financial Planning Inc. Center for Financial Planning Inc. Is not a registered broker-dealer and is independent of Raymond James Financial Services Planning Inc. Center for Financial Planning Inc. Is not a registered broker-dealer and is independent of Raymond James Financial Services.

Speaker 2:

Hey there, and welcome back to the Divorce Rich Podcast. Today's episode is a little different and I'm really excited to share it with you. Recently, I had the chance to be a guest on the Journey Beyond Divorce podcast hosted by the incredible Karen McMahon. If you're not familiar with Karen's work, her show is a fantastic resource for anyone navigating the often overwhelming experience of divorce.

Speaker 2:

In this conversation, we dive deep into a topic that's near and dear to my heart. Money moves that just can't wait, especially when you're going through a major life transition like divorce, whether you're in the early stages or rebuilding your financial life afterward. This episode is packed with insights you won't want to miss. I'm thrilled to introduce you to Karen's podcast and hope you'll check out more of her episodes after this one. So, without further ado, here's my conversation with Karen McMahon on Journey Beyond Divorce. Staying on top of it and checking in with yourself on that keeps you in control of making those decisions, instead of getting to the point where you bury your head in the sand, you don't know what's going on and then something all of a sudden comes up.

Speaker 1:

Welcome to the Journey Beyond Divorce podcast, where we explore the many facets of complex divorce and invite you into a journey of healing and personal transformation that will radically change your divorce experience and set you up to be effective and feel empowered. I'm Karen McMahon, your host and founder of Journey Beyond Divorce. Let's dive in. Hey everyone, welcome back.

Speaker 1:

Today we're talking about post-divorce money moves that can't wait, and we're having this conversation because, once the divorce is finished, so many of us are just ready to move on and really important business can be left on the table. So I'm glad that you're here. It's a really important topic. I'm being joined by Jackie Ressler, who is a certified divorce financial analyst with nearly 30 years of experience helping people navigate the complex financial terrain of divorce, and she's created and what we're going to talk about today is a smart, strategic post-divorce roadmap, and what Jackie does is she breaks down into timeframes what needs to be done once the ink is dry on that settlement, the things that people forget to do that harm them in the first three, six and 12 months after your divorce is final. And so you can read all about Jackie in the show notes. She's also the host of Divorce Rich podcast, so check that out and I'll be on her podcast as well, but with no further ado, welcome, jackie.

Speaker 2:

Thank you. Thank you for having me. I'm so excited to be on this show. I am a regular listener of this show and I have been for a while, so I'm thrilled to be here today.

Speaker 1:

Well, thanks so much for joining us. Jackie, before we dive in a quick question, to just give the audience a broader perspective of who you are, can you share with us something that you're particularly proud of at this stage in your life, Professionally, personally, professionally, personally, professionally Whatever works for you?

Speaker 2:

Oh sure, yeah, I am very proud of personally. Professionally, I'm proud of 30 years of experience doing this, which I never thought I would do when I first started. I never thought this was going to be my life's passion, this work. So I'm very proud that I have been able to maintain a practice doing what I love and helping people. And personally, I am very proud of my children. This is such a cliche answer, but so true. I'm just so proud of them as individuals. I think that both of my children have faced challenges in their lives that I didn't have to face when I was their age, and I'm very proud of their resilience.

Speaker 1:

Well, beautiful. Thank you for that answer. Thank you for that answer. So we're all so exhausted and ready for the divorce to be over when it's over, that a lot of people just close the book and move on and they assume my attorney's taking care of everything. The settlement is going to be stamped by the judge sometime in the next whatever three to nine months and let me start living my life. What's missing from that perspective?

Speaker 2:

So that is, to me, the scariest perspective that someone would express right when their divorce is done. But I understand it, because people are. They have decision fatigue, they're tired of making decisions, they're tired. I can't tell you how many times I hear towards the end of a case I just want this to be done, I just want this to be over, and I get that. I've been divorced also and I know what that feels like.

Speaker 2:

But that is the worst thing that you can do, because there are some things that need to be handled immediately or they're going to end up costing you more time, maybe legal fees, more aggravation and more money. So, from a financial I look at everything with a financial eye and from a financial perspective when the divorce is done is not the time to take your foot off the pedal. You really need to regroup. Give yourself, maybe give yourself a couple of weeks. Give yourself a little bit of time. Give yourself a small treat, whatever that is for you, whether it's getting a massage or doing something fun with a friend, going on a trip, a small trip. But immediately after the divorce is done, there are some things that you really need to get on right away to protect your financial future.

Speaker 1:

So, before we dive in, I would love to hear what's the top level checklist.

Speaker 2:

So the top level checklist are things I always tell people things that you need to do immediately, within the first three months post-divorce. Then there are things that you need to do immediately within the first three months post-divorce. Then there are things that you need to do soon, so within the first six months post-divorce, and things that you need to do a little bit later, but still within the first year after divorce, and from a high level. All of the things that you want to get done immediately are things that if you delay, you could end up sabotaging yourself financially, and so all of the things that we're going to talk about. To me, all of these things are critical and I put together, I have a game plan that anyone that's listening can download if they want, and they can customize it, and I'll provide the link to that. But number one nobody wants to hear this but number one is you have to sit down with your final settlement agreement, your final judgment of divorce, no matter what state you're in. You're listening to this right now. I'm in Michigan, but this is true no matter what state you're in, you need to sit down with that judgment with your phone, if that's where you keep your calendar or a hard copy of a calendar and you need to go through and you need to take note of anything that has a date associated with it when something is going to change or be adjusted, as well as what are the things. What is the financial settlement that you received and what do you need to get on top of right away to transfer things into your own name to get your new health insurance, any financial piece in the settlement agreement you want to highlight, take notes and keep it handy.

Speaker 2:

The judgment on divorce needs to be nearby the first year. You're going to be referring back to it frequently. I refer back to mine. I've been divorced for almost nine years and I'm still looking back to remember what do we agree about this one date? But, for example, people that their child support might change when a child reaches the age of majority. Put that in your calendar so that you are aware that's coming. If you're going to be getting a portion of someone's bonus income which a lot of my clients do, make a note. What's the date that their bonus is paid? What do you need to do to be able to collect that information? Do you need to get a text receipt? Do you need to get a W-2 from them. Those are all things that, while it's fresh in your mind, I always recommend that you go through, get out a cup of coffee, whatever is going to help you relax and go through that line by line, that judgment.

Speaker 1:

I love the idea of like just plotting on your calendar. I live by the rule that if it's not on my calendar it's not happening, right exactly. Calendar runs my life and, with so many of us and with calendars being electronic, how easy to just go in and I would say, if you know when your child support is ending, like, put it in six months earlier, exactly, like I would put it in a couple of times as a reminder. Hey, this part of the gravy train is coming to a stop.

Speaker 2:

Right, or first a lot of people. I have cases where they have agreed that every year they're going to exchange tax returns and they're going to redo child support. You can create whatever complication you want for yourself in your settlement agreement to make it work, but people need to have reminders because no one is. Once the divorce is done, the attorney is not going to be letting you know a few months before your child support changes. That's not their role. So you have to immediately start to be your own advocate.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I always say that there are no divorce cops walking the streets, so whatever it is that you need, it's all on you. Now your team has faded away, so this is okay. So right off the bat when it comes to bonuses, when it comes to spousal support, child support, anything like that. So this is the first three months that we're in now.

Speaker 2:

The first three months. And another important thing to take a look at is who especially if we're coming up on now we're coming up on tax season when we're taping this, but really a lot of things have to happen by the end of December in the previous tax year. So you want to look am I who's claiming each one of the children? If I have, if there are minor children involved, who gets to claim the child tax credit? Am I able to claim head of household? Those are things that you want to make sure that you look at immediately and if you need help and you have not been the one handling the taxes one of the things that you might want to do is initially reach out to a CPA or a tax specialist to help you with that.

Speaker 1:

A hundred percent, yeah. So okay, what's next?

Speaker 2:

So what's next? So also, I'm going to say this should happen in the first three months, this should also happen within the first six months and this should also happen at the one year anniversary mark of your divorce. And nobody likes to hear this. I don't like to call it a budget because that has a nasty connotation but everyone needs to look at what their spending plan is and that needs to happen immediately after the divorce. But everyone needs to look at what their spending plan is and that needs to happen immediately after the divorce and it needs to happen throughout that first year so that you can touch base with yourself to see how you're doing.

Speaker 2:

Now, hopefully, while the divorce process was going on, clients are coming up with their living expenses and giving that to their attorney. That doesn't always happen. To me, it's a critical component of knowing what your life is going to look like. How do you know how to project if you're going to be okay financially if you don't know what you spend every month? So let's say that you hadn't done that during the divorce process.

Speaker 1:

Well, speak to it from this angle, if you could. I lived at home. We all lived under the same roof until the divorce was complete. So now I'm going out and I'm getting, let's say, an apartment for me and the kids or a home for me and the kids, and so I don't even know a lot of those numbers because I'm not there yet. Let's take it from that angle.

Speaker 1:

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Speaker 2:

The great perspective to start from is that I don't know what the housing component is going to be, or a lot of people they're unsure what the housing component is going to be. They might have kept the house and they're not sure if they can afford it. Or if they weren't the bill payer, they don't know what the cost is for the electricity and the utilities and the landscaping. So we need to start tracking those things. Nowadays it's a lot easier to track our discretionary spending than it used to be, because most of us are not paying with cash. Most of us are paying with either our bank account, through a debit card or credit cards, and then you can go backwards and you can actually look at wow, is this what I'm really spending on food or groceries is a big one for a lot of people.

Speaker 2:

People are spending a lot more, yes, especially these days with inflation being so high. But even aside from that, I think that getting a handle on your discretionary expenses is a very empowering thing for someone coming out of a divorce to do, because a budget I don't like the word, but a budget really isn't to be restrictive, but it gives you control, because if I know that it's really important to me to get my nails done every month or something like that. That might be more important to me in decision making than having coffee four or five times a week. But again, when I see it on paper and I can see what I'm spending my money on, it gives me the power to make those kinds of decisions. And I think, looking at it from a perspective of being female and as women, I don't think that we often sit down and do that task and I think we happen to be really good at it once we sit down and look at our expenses and making those kinds of decisions. But it's all about having knowledge about what you're spending.

Speaker 1:

So I love what you're saying about the empowered part, jackie, because I think that either I'm controlling my money or my money is controlling me, and if there's more month at the end of my money, I'm not in very good shape, and so this really allows you to have choice, whereas when we don't do the budget, we don't sit down and look at it, we feel like we don't have choice, even though we do Right, right.

Speaker 2:

We feel out of control and somebody who's just newly divorced whatever they can do to make themselves feel like they are more in control, the better, and this is one way. That is a very simple way, and I always tell clients that say to me I've never had a budget, I've never lived with a budget. That's probably 90% of all Americans. That's true, we spend what we make For a lot of people. I work with a lot of very high net worth people that don't have any assets because they spend everything. But this is a great opportunity for single people newly divorced to take control in this one area that they can take control of. So I can't control inflation, I can't control the stock market. I can control my spending, and that is again, I think, a really important thing to continually revisit throughout the first year after your divorce.

Speaker 1:

I was just going to circle back to that. So you said three, six and 12 months or quarterly, like you're really saying keep an eye on it, keep tracking it. And why is that? I just want you to underscore the thing.

Speaker 2:

So keeping an eye on it keeps you in line with your goals. So, if my goal is, I'm done with the divorce and I just want to make sure that I can pay my bills every month and I can feel comfortable, that's going to and I'm watching and I see that I'm going over. Every month. I'm going over what I had projected to spend. Well, that might be an indication to me that maybe I need to sell my house, or maybe I need to cut back in some areas that are discretionary for my children. Maybe there's some extracurriculars that we just can't do.

Speaker 2:

Staying on top of it and checking in with yourself on that keeps you in control of making those decisions, Instead of getting to the point where you bury your head in the sand. You don't know what's going on and then something all of a sudden comes up and you can't afford it. Or all of a sudden, I can't afford the house. Now it's winter and it's not a great time to put it up for sale. These are all things that again, are ways for people who are newly divorced to have this opportunity to take control of their finances unconsciously.

Speaker 1:

I years ago at least 10 years ago used to see people in my home and I would have the single mom who was really struggling financially. I gave her a big discount and this woman showed up with a venti size Starbucks and when we began to talk about it, it turns out that and sometimes she would bring me one, and this is something that she did both for herself and generously for others, like five to seven days a week. Wow, when we just started I was like, ok, no judgment, we're not. It's lovely that you're so generous and you enjoy coffee, but let's just take a look, let's just run some numbers and, like her jaw hit the ground because, right, she wasn't, she wasn't consciously choosing that.

Speaker 2:

That was such a big priority and yet it was taking a chunk of her budget that she, like, didn't even give thought to exactly so prioritizing maybe staying in the house under coffee, and again, I think it sounds ridiculous, but when people go back through their living expenses and they take a look at what they've spent on there whether it's their bank statement it's a really eye-opening experience for everyone.

Speaker 1:

A hundred percent, a hundred percent. I'm not going to tell another story. Okay, so we're taking a look at our settlement and putting it on the calendar. We're taking a look at how we're managing and spending our money and we're checking it out quarterly that first year. What else are we doing?

Speaker 2:

So within the first three months. Actually, what I really like to say is that as soon as you're done with the divorce and you walk out of the divorce court, you need to do this one thing, but I'll give it three months. I'll say, within the first three to six months, get your quadro done. So a quadro is a qualified domestic relations order short for that we call them quadros and that is the legal document that is going to transfer retirement account assets from one person to their former spouse pursuant to the divorce. Now I'm in Michigan and so we have a lot of people that work for the automotive industry and so we've got a lot of pensions and we've got a lot of 401ks. But for many people around the country, the most valuable asset that they have is their retirement account, and sometimes that's even more valuable than the equity that they have in their home. So we have this really valuable asset within the marital estate and what I find is that, as the door is hitting the client on the backside, sometimes the attorney will yell out and, by the way, get a quadro. And the clients don't even know what that is.

Speaker 2:

I used to draft quadros. My firm in Michigan. I co-owned a firm and we drafted about a thousand orders a year for Michigan attorneys and I would say five times out of 10 and we drafted about a thousand orders a year for Michigan attorneys and I would say five times out of 10, we'd get a phone call from someone saying I don't know why I'm calling you, I don't know what my attorney said. I have to call you. But they don't really have any idea of what the process is and what's going on. It usually takes clients. I would tell people expect that it's going to be three to six months from the date you start working on the quadro until the date the money gets into your name. So if you're counting on that money to pay off a home equity loan or to pay off your lawyer fees, you can count on the fact that you're not going to get a distribution from that for three to six months until when you start. So I always tell clients I feel like there's like a bomb about to go off above your head.

Speaker 2:

You want to get that quadro done ASAP. And I was just talking to someone on the phone yesterday and said that my husband is getting it taken care of. It's his account. And I said nope, go back to your judgment. Usually the judgment of divorce says who is preparing the quadro. You reach out to that person, you get their forms, you fill them out and then usually the quadro preparer will reach out to the former spouse to collect their part of the information. But you want to get that paperwork going ASAP Because even when the quadro is drafted and entered in the court, you're still not protected.

Speaker 2:

The final say for who approves the order or not is the plan administrator. So the plan administrator is a third party. It's not either attorney, it's not the judge in your case, it's not either client. It is completely dependent on this third party that has nothing to do with your case, whether or not the order is even approved. A lot of orders are approved the first time out. A lot of them are not, and that doesn't mean that they were prepared incorrectly either. But if your quadro is not entered ASAP, you could end up and let's say that your former spouse dies, remarries or retires you could end up getting less or nothing than what you thought from that retirement account, and that's how critical it is to get it done right away.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, so in the show notes you will find another podcast episode a couple of years ago that I did, which talked about the nightmares that can happen. So I just want to underscore what Jackie is saying here. This is so vitally important. The show that you can access in the show notes literally tells stories of people who lost tens, hundreds of thousands of dollars, and I an attorney who says, oh, it's just a form, I do this all the time, I'll fill it out. Can we just highlight what you think about that?

Speaker 2:

for example, ford Motor Company, they don't do their own quadros, they outsource it to a third party administrator. So third party administrators, they have their own rules and they deal with thousands, millions of different plans, and so they would love it if you would fill out the form that they have that has checkboxes, and you just check out the boxes and that's your quadro, because then they don't have to train anybody to actually read your quadro and see what it says. They just have to train somebody to understand their form. The problem with the model quadro that some attorneys say, well, I'll fill out that model for you, is that it benefits the plan. It doesn't ever benefit the employee or the non-employee spouse. I've seen models that actually negatively impact the employee, their own client. So again, there are many choices that you can make in a quadro, and a quadro is never neutral. It always benefits one side at the expense of the other, unless all of the terms have been negotiated.

Speaker 2:

And unfortunately, what happens in a lot of cases is that attorneys and I don't want to bash attorneys, I work with some wonderful attorneys and happens in a lot of cases is that attorneys and I don't want to bash attorneys, I work with some wonderful attorneys and it's a complicated area, this quadro area, because it's always changing. But attorneys will often use a template from the last 25 cases they had. Ford's plan is completely different than Chrysler and Kraft and, like all of these plans, every plan is different. So having a template is usually not beneficial. Again, to the client. It's in my opinion, it's always best to have someone that's a consultant, anyone that's going to be drafting your quadro. They would be more than happy to take a look at the language in your judgment before you sign it to make sure that it benefits you.

Speaker 1:

So that was where I was just going to go. So what I don't understand about what you're saying, jackie, is if attorneys like, as you're leaving and going, hey, have a nice life and hey, by the way, don't forget about the quadro. How did we negotiate this? Like? How is the entire quadro negotiated, since it's so complex and it's often people's largest or second largest asset? Is there a quadro expert that should be brought in earlier on? Yes, absolutely.

Speaker 2:

There are quadro experts that should be brought on earlier. There are some CDFAs that have specialized knowledge in that area. I advise all of the attorneys that I work with. They will bring me in early on a case. Even if I'm not working on the case from beginning to end as a litigation support specialist, it still will take me five or 10 minutes to review the language and make sure that the client understands what they're agreeing to and that it benefits them, because the language looks very similar in some of the language. It looks like boilerplate language and it looks like it's very confusing to me.

Speaker 2:

You need to know 10 things. It's not brain surgery. If you know those 10 things, you can review a quadro, but you have to know what those things are to look for. As an example, right now the stock market is experiencing a lot of volatility. So are you going is your division date today? And then are you going to get investment gains and losses from the date today, the division date to the day you actually get the money. That's negotiable. So if you are a very highly risk-averse person, maybe you don't want to get any of the gains or losses, maybe you just want that dollar amount. That's not even discussed in most divorce cases. That's a really mild example of a way to that people are not being educated about their choices.

Speaker 1:

It's there are other choices that are much more significant and I know I'm going a little bit off the beaten track here, but I think that if I were to summarize this part is if a quadro is part of your settlement, you want to reach out to a quadro expert and have them involved, and you definitely want them to at least review, if not prepare, the paperwork so that you're protected. And the post-divorce part of it is to look that over, because you've got a three to six month journey before you're seeing any money and if there are going to be some speed bumps, let's be on top of them.

Speaker 2:

Right and sometimes things get stuck. So something might get stuck at the plan administrator's desk. Let's say there is no. The federal law does not list out any amount of time that a has to be reviewed and submitted back to the parties once they receive it, unless the person is retired. If they're retired, then the plan administrator has to review it within 18 months and get an answer out. If they're not retired, there's no limit on how long it can sit on someone's desk. So while the market is going up and down and you need the money, there's no requirement that has to be approved or rejected within a certain amount of time. So I always tell clients look up who's the plan administrator. If you don't hear anything back within a month, put it on your calendar and you reach out to them and you'll be the squeaky wheel, the one that they would like to get off of their desk because you call them all the time. What is the status of my quadro? It's not fun, but it's so important.

Speaker 1:

Jackie. I mean this part of the conversation was worth the price of admission right here Like thank you so much for that, because just I know there are people who are vigorously pulling out their pen and writing down notes for themselves right now.

Speaker 2:

We're still in the first three months to do is obviously get going in any quadros and any other accounts that are being transferred into your name. Let's say that I'm dividing up a brokerage account and I have to open up a new brokerage account the transfer forms if I need to have my married name on there. Rather than make it more difficult when assets get transferred into my name, keep your name on whatever you need to keep on so that everything can be transferred appropriately, even if you are having money direct deposited into your account every month and it starts off in a certain name. Make sure that you have all of that figured out before you just go ahead and change your name and your bank accounts and your brokerage accounts. Make it easier on yourself.

Speaker 1:

Oh, my God, so valuable, so important.

Speaker 2:

Another item within the first six months is make sure that if you are the one receiving your house that there has been a quick claim deed filed. Some attorneys will do that automatically, Some will not. Don't assume. We want to make sure that you check with your attorney what is that.

Speaker 1:

Can you explain what that is?

Speaker 2:

Sure, well, that will change the title from joint name. Let's say, if you own your house jointly and you were awarded the home in the divorce, you want to make sure that the title is right and that it gets transferred into just your name so that you can sell it and do what you want with it in the future One of those things that you don't want to leave out there lingering. It's also a really good time within the first six months Also somewhat of a difficult task. Aside from transferring qualified plans like 401ks, we also want to make sure that any IRA accounts that need to be transferred, that the paperwork is started for that and any other post-tax accounts. So every custodian unfortunately post-tax accounts. So every custodian unfortunately requires different paperwork. So it's not so simple as well.

Speaker 2:

We have an account at Vanguard or we have an account at Fidelity and we're just going to divide it in half. Don't assume that that's going to happen. So somebody if you're the one getting the money, let's say that it should be you should call Vanguard or look on their website and find the forms that they need to divide up mutual fund accounts or stock accounts. It's usually going to be more detailed than transfer 50% into my name and you need to have cooperation between both people. So I even recommend to people you might even want to look while the divorce process is going on and see what kind of paperwork might be needed so that you can get that important signature from the other person while there's still some cooperation between the two of you. But this is also something that people think is a pretty simple thing to do. That's easy. We'll take care of it. Don't assume that any of these account transfers are going to be easy, because they're usually not.

Speaker 1:

Okay, this is some pretty important, serious work we're talking about here.

Speaker 2:

Yes, I think so too, and I guess I think that oftentimes attorneys do have an exit interview with their client, but people are so overwhelmed that they don't hear everything A hundred percent. And that is. It's not that the attorneys didn't tell them, it's just that they're not ready to hear it. And I have clients that I will meet with and I go through a post-divorce game plan tailored to them specifically with. You need to call Fidelity, you need to call the End Guard here's a form I want you to use for this and still, six months later, if I reach out to them, they are still. They haven't done it, they're still working up to doing it.

Speaker 1:

I just want to say something. I have interviewed so many CDFAs over the last nine years and this is a brilliant conversation Like this. This has never been so clear to me, and I've been doing this for 15 years. I've spoken to dozens of you and interviewed dozens of you. So, folks, this is priceless. In fact, if this is piquing your interest, listen to the whole show again from the beginning, with pen and paper, and there's a gift for you that will help. That Jackie will get to in a few minutes.

Speaker 1:

But this is, I'm telling you, this is priceless. Re-listen, take notes. And it also I'll just take a moment to say truly highlights why hiring a CDFA is so vitally important, and I say that to people regardless of how much money they have. But if you're receiving any kind of money, and certainly significant money don't rely on your best friend who's good with numbers, or even your CPA. Definitely get somebody who really understands the entire game and the long game and how to help you succeed. Jackie, I just I know we have more, but I just needed to oh, thank you, Thank you and highlight your incredible knowledge.

Speaker 2:

So the last things that I would. I think we want to talk about too as we get to the. What do you do within the first year? What do you want to make sure that you get done? Two things I would really want to highlight. One would be estate planning.

Speaker 2:

Again, one of those things that nobody likes to think about, no one wants to talk about, is what happens after I die. But once you are divorced, you need to make sure that things happen the way you want them to happen, and that means that if you have minor children and something God forbid happens to you, you can't change the custody. Your former spouse, most likely, is going to get custody, but what you can change is the way that the money is handled and thinking about what do I want to have happen with my money as far as it relates to my children, if something happens to me while they're still minors? Even when they're not minors anymore, you want to make sure that you think through. What do you want to have happen with your money? Do you want it to go directly to children when they're 18? Do you want there to be restrictions on that? Do you know that your ex-spouse is going to take care of them. Have you talked about college? Have you talked about other kinds of ways that you might want to help them? That all needs to be addressed in estate planning. And also, if something happens to you where you cannot make financial or health-related decisions for yourself, you want to make sure that you have that legal document in place that says who will, because you certainly don't want it to fall back on your ex-spouse. But it's important to think about those things and get that paperwork in line, maybe even create a trust for your documents, for your assets to title, to transfer things into. Those are things that are important to think about and definitely need to be on the list within the first year.

Speaker 2:

Another important piece, another component within the first year for clients that don't have a financial advisor, it's a good time for them to meet with someone and take a look at what their long-term financial goals are versus short-term and make sure that they're on track for their own retirement. And so, again, I think that after the divorce is scary financially for a lot of people, but it is such a great opportunity to really take control, and I think oftentimes, as women, we give up financial decision-making power to ourselves, and it's not that's a bad thing. People divide up tasks in a marriage. Not everybody does everything, but at some point in our lives as women, we're all going to be managing our money on our own. Women live longer than men.

Speaker 2:

The divorce rates are really high. This is a great opportunity for people to really step into that driver's seat and educate themselves about and I'm not saying that they should turn over their investments necessarily to a financial advisor and not be involved. I think that they need to educate themselves to the point where they know that the investment decisions that they're making are in line with their financial goals. So that's my last piece of advice then we'll be saying goodbye.

Speaker 1:

So we talked about grabbing your calendar and putting all of those milestone dates on that are in your settlement in terms of alimony and child support and other important dates. The importance of budgeting and that first year, revisiting your budget once a quarter and seeing how you're doing, that you're staying on track, that you'll be okay for the long run. The vital importance of getting professional support around your quadro, which is pensions and retirement funds, and support going beyond your attorney. A quadro expert is what you're looking for there. If you want to change your name from your married name back to your maiden name, please make sure that you wait and that money is exchanged and talk to your attorney about that or your financial planner about that. If you're getting the house a quick claim deed and then I have here IRA and post tax accounts but I don't have the directive. What was the directive on that one For IRAs and post-tax accounts to?

Speaker 2:

obtain all the paperwork that you need and don't assume it's going to be simple. So, going into that task, prepare that this might take a little bit of effort. Better to know that up front and be willing to deal with whatever you need to do to get that money into your name.

Speaker 1:

Beautiful. Do your estate planning, take care of your beneficiaries, your power of attorney, your health care proxy, all that kind of stuff and make sure your kids are going to be okay, and then talk to somebody about long-term goals so that you don't feel like you have to work until 101 years old. Yeah, that about does it. Yeah, that was so incredibly valuable and this is actually outlined in your gift, isn't it? Yes?

Speaker 2:

So I will provide a link for your show notes. It is a post-divorce game plan. It's a writable document and everyone can download it and fill it out. It's got a lot of detail in it, but also space to put your own information. So make sure you have your judgment of divorce handy with you so that you can go through it together.

Speaker 2:

Yes, and the name of your podcast again is my podcast is called the Divorce Rich Podcast and I'm so excited to have you as my guest on a podcast and your website is it's wrestlerdivorcecom. R-o-e-s-s-l-e-r-divorcecom.

Speaker 1:

And that too is in the show notes, as well as her podcast links. So please go check out Jackie's podcast. Definitely grab the gift and keep it close and work on that. This has truly been a priceless conversation. I feel like you've saved so many people thousands, if not tens of thousands or more dollars in just giving this guidance. So thank you so much.

Speaker 2:

Oh, thank you so much for having me. I really enjoyed talking with you.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, this was great and, of course, folks, we'll be back real soon with another episode. You have a great day. Thanks for joining us on the Journey Beyond Divorce podcast with another episode. You have a great day. Us at jbddivorcesupportcom, where our team of coaches support both men and women through our one-on-one coaching group programs, online courses and free resources. Stay tuned for our next episode and I'll talk to you soon.

Speaker 2:

Thank you so much for taking time out of your day to listen to Divorce Rich Podcast. If you like this podcast, please follow us on Apple or anywhere that you download podcasts and share this link with any friends or family that you think might benefit from this information.

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Jacki Roessler, CDFA

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